Nothing Left to Burn by Heather Ezell

Author:Heather Ezell
Language: eng
Format: epub
Publisher: Penguin Young Readers Group
Published: 2018-03-13T04:00:00+00:00

36

1:22 P.M.

Hayden is running down his driveway, asking me to wait.

“Hey,” he calls. “Audrey, hold up!”

He’s still in his basketball shorts and that faded green shirt, his eyes still water blue, his hair a mess. He holds a hand to his chest, and I understand. I feel it too. It’s growing more difficult to breathe. The smoke is thickening. With each minute, the fire grows.

“You okay?” I ask.

He’s baffled. That’s his question. You okay? I see it in his eyes that that was what he was going to ask me. “Yeah, yeah.” He shakes his head. “I wanted to make sure you’re all right.”

Every hair on my body is on end. “Why wouldn’t I be?”

“Well, for starters, you were evacuated and ran into a fire—”

“Do not fall prey to your sister’s dramatics.”

“And you don’t look okay.”

“Gee, thanks.” I feign a grin. “Need I remind you that looks can be deceiving?”

“I heard you,” he says. “In the shower, I heard you crying.” My mouth goes dry. “And you’re about to drive to the hospital to see Maya. I know how—”

“She passed out,” I say, too loudly. “It happens when you’re dancing sometimes.”

Hayden looks at me. “Last night. You weren’t all right last night, Audrey. You can’t ask me to lie to Grace about that.”

“I didn’t ask you to,” I say. “You can tell her the truth.”

“And what’s that exactly?”

“I drank too much and needed a ride home.” I hitch my backpack up my shoulder and turn to trudge down the driveway. If only it snowed in Orange County, it’d make a nice sledding slope. “That’s the truth.”

Hayden walks with me. “Did Brooks try something?”

“Nothing I didn’t agree to do.”

“What about Friday?” His voice is high. “At lunch, what you said—did.”

And I remember the pulse of Hayden’s lips on mine, his hands finding the curve of my waist. But he can’t say it. He can’t admit that we kissed. He still doesn’t know how to communicate, how to be angry. I am a terrible person because I’m grateful for this.

He pushes his glasses up his nose. “Audrey, I’m—”

“I’m sorry. I have to go.” I look at my phone. 1:31 P.M. I can’t do this right now. We’ve been standing in the smoke, and I can’t talk, right now I can’t talk about it. “Maya. The fire.”

“What did Brooks do?”

“You and Grace,” I say. “You guys are so convinced Brooks is this monster.” My heart hammers. “What if it’s me that’s the problem?”

“I know you. I know it’s not you.”

I start walking again. “Isn’t Friday enough proof?”

A pause. “But that wasn’t only you,” he finally says. “Friday. It wasn’t just—” And it’s the first time he’s admitted it, that he was an active participant until he shoved me away. And now he says, “Let me come with you. I heard you ask Grace. I can drive you.”

“I don’t need a babysitter, Hayden.”

The hurt hits him quick. I see it. The way he stops. Steps back. The way his already-dying smile fades, and he can’t look at me.

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